One Step...

I wish I could please everyone.

I do.

It's in my nature. I've been called a people pleaser for most of my life. And the truth is, I am. I want to make people happy, sometimes to a fault. Sometimes at the expense of myself.

This whole experience has really taught me that I can't please everyone. It's taught me that it's okay to not please everyone.

People seem to have a lot of suggestions for how we should be doing things. People seem to have a lot of suggestions in general. I literally sat with someone today who told me they are curing Alzheimer's with diet and exercise. I wanted to be like, "Oh really?? Is that all we are missing? Thank you so much!" I know people mean well ... they do, sometimes it is just annoying!

I'm struggling with what people think today because I'm in a situation where I am disappointing some people. I am having to put my family first and make some decisions that some people won't agree with. It's hard for me, because I want to do what I feel is right, but I also don't want other people to be upset with me. So today I'm claiming that my best is enough for God, even when it's not enough for others.

I have not only decided to move back in with my parents, but I am going to be leaving my current job and taking an online job that will allow me the opportunity to stay at home with my mother. The school district that I work for has been very generous and kind in allowing me to do this. Ultimately, this decision is not about me, it is about my mom and for right now she gets to come first.

I will miss my students GREATLY. They are why I do what I do. I will miss watching them realize how smart they actually are and achieve the success they are looking for. I will miss investing in their lives and my own life becoming so much richer because of it.

However, I'm trusting in this moment that God is big enough. He has a plan. NONE of this is catching Him off guard or by surprise. He is still sovereign and He is still directing steps.

I'm also realizing that all I can do right now is put one foot in front of the other, giving Him my very best. He will meet me right here where I am. He's not asking for anything other than a next step right now. So that's what I'll do. I'll keep clinging to Him, taking each step and trusting that He is not going to let me fall...too hard.