It's Not Enough (A Rant on Education)

She stood in my room surrounded by people but I could tell she wanted to talk. She kept her head down and didn’t look anyone in the eye. I asked how her job was and she just shook her head, eyes down. Once the excitement of her return wore off, I said let’s walk. We took off down the hall on a familiar path worn from the soles of many before.

Before the words came, the tears fell. They dripped silently down her cheeks and we just stopped. I opened my arms and she fell in, folding herself into me like a small child. The tears turned to sobs and I just held her. After a few moments, the tears stopped, she pushed her shoulders back, shook her head as if shaking off something I couldn’t quite see, and picked up her pace.

She told me then of the hurt since she left these halls. She thought getting that piece of paper that said she was a high school graduate would change things for her. Instead she’s found herself sleeping in abandoned houses, on porches, or bouncing from one friend’s couch to the next. She thought “graduating” would open doors; instead she’s lost her job, her family and her faith.

We talked a bit longer; I hugged her again and couldn’t stop myself from wondering if I’d see her again. When she donned these hallways she talked daily of graduation day which just happens to be next week. I wonder if I’ll get to watch her small, courageous self walk across that stage. I wonder where she will sleep tonight, where she’ll find food, will she be okay.

During this week where I see fellow teacher friends posting about the hell that is standardized testing and what the scores mean for us, for students, for schools…I can’t help but think we are missing the point of it all.  Over the weekend our news stories were inundated with the “news” that 16% of Oklahoma’s 3^rd graders failed their state reading tests.  Never mind the fact that we never heard that 64% of those beautiful students scored proficient, because let’s face it that’s not news.

There are new (ridiculous, in my opinion) regulations almost daily it feels like for teachers. At this point we are now being told that starting in the 2014-2015 school year 33% of our evaluations as teachers will be dependent upon our students standardized testing scores. I won’t put my opinions on this for fear of retaliation J but let me just tell you again I think we’ve missed the point.

Yes, students who walk away with a high school diploma have a chance at working a mediocre job for mediocre pay, but do we really expect our students to be concerned about their academic performance on standardized state testing when they don’t even know where they are going to sleep at night.

What kind of skills are we teaching them? What are we giving them that will make them better individuals in their communities? Do they really need to be able to identify that Grendel is the antagonist in the story of Beowulf in order to fully reach their ultimate potential?

My heart is heavy today as I look at my students. I’m teaching them how to identify participle phrases and gerunds, but what about teaching them what to do when they find themselves with no home, no food, no support and have no idea what step to take next. I know some of you think I might be over-exaggerating their circumstances or taking the circumstance of one student and trying to apply it to all. 

Come meet my kids. Spend a day with us. I have kids who are waiting on the results of a pregnancy test and can barely focus on the words in front of them as they think through every terrifying scenario in their mind. I have kids whose parents have said just drop out. You need to be at home helping out plus you’re not smart enough to graduate anyway. I have kids who come here from 8-2 and head to work at 2:30 and don’t get home until well after midnight only to get up and do it again the next day and the next and the next. I have kids whose home situations would make you cringe and lay awake at night realizing how privileged you are.  I have kids who when I ask them to write about their childhoods aren’t even really sure what that means since they clearly didn’t have one.

Yes, our schools need to be a place that educates our students. They need to be able to read. They need to be able to write. They need general education skills, but they need SO much more from us. They need a safe place to grow and develop skills that I’d venture to say most are not getting at home. My kids don’t come where I come from. They don’t have someone teaching them basic work ethic and respect. It could be because the parents themselves just don’t care or it could be because they are working themselves to the bone trying to provide for their families that They. Just. Can’t.

We’ve got to stop blaming the parents and find a way to come alongside them and help them.  We’ve got to do better because their future depends on it.

As I watched her walk to the car of a friend who had given her a ride up here to get her cap and gown I thought about how far she’d come. She was one of the ones who worked from 2:30pm – 2:30 am and then got up at 8am to come to school til 2 to do it all over again. She and I fought like hell through Beowulf, MacBeth, William Blake and Jonathan Swift. She hated writing and grammar and really school, but she did it! She fought hard and worked hard and she’s getting that diploma. But at a time when she should be out celebrating all her hard work her thoughts are consumed with where she’ll sleep tonight.

I don’t have the answers for education. I don’t have the answers for much. But I do know something has to change.  It reminds me of the old adage, “If you think the answer is simple, you clearly don’t understand the problem.”

If you are an educator in Oklahoma you should follow Rob Miller’s Blog http://viewfromtheedge.net/. He speaks the truth like it is and doesn’t really care what others think about that! In a recent post I read this quote, “Children who are loved come to school to learn; those who are not, come to school to be loved.” Oh. My. Goodness. One of the most important things I can give my students is the knowledge that they are loved and valued as human beings. No. Matter. What.

I believe in second chances (and 99^th for that matter) but I also believe in responsibility and consequences. I’m in NO way suggesting a lovey dovey environment where we forego teaching our kids basic responsibility and respectability, just wanted to be clear on that! But I do believe in teaching our students value. I do believe in teaching them that they matter. I do believe in giving them hope not stealing it away from them.

This is a lesson that transfers to so much more than just education too. As a society we have become mean, judgmental and harsh. What happened to valuing one another regardless of our overwhelming differences? I don’t know about you … but I want to show people they matter. They are loved. No. Matter. What.